The Desires of Your Heart

I remember walking around the neighborhood with my then fiance’, talking about what we’d name our future children.  We had 6 names picked out, three boys and three girls.

But then we had twins…then autism, then ADHD, then another boy, and then ear infections, severe asthma, multiple food allergies, constant illness, and autism again, and ADHD again… that kinda put a damper on the thoughts of having any more children.

I had totally given up on the thoughts of more children, but I so much wanted a Rebecca Joy in my arms.  I think I may have even gone through the grieving process that this would never happen.  If anyone asked if we would have more kids, I’d always reply with a quick, “NO!”  (with the “are you crazy? We have enough going on as it is.” implied!)

We were overwhelmed enough.  It couldn’t even be thought of.

But God knew how much we wanted another child, and probably…it was Him putting that desire in our hearts.  He saw past all the rubbish, stress and insanity of our lives, and he decided to give us a baby girl after all…

Psalm 37:4 says, “Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”

How wonderful is that?

I had my first ultrasound this week and she (yes, the answer to Princess Buttercup’s prayers for the last 2 years have been answered with a big, “YES!”) is doing wonderfully!

Here is a picture of my little skeleton:

A final thought: From the beginning, God has had good plans for our lives, and no circumstance, no illness or disability, no evil intentions, not even Satan himself, can thwart His plan.

“Remember the former things, those of long ago; I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like me. I make known the end from the beginning, from ancient times, what is still to come. I say: My purpose will stand, and I will do all that I please. From the east I summon a bird of prey; from a far-off land, a man to fulfill my purpose. What I have said, that will I bring about; what I have planned, that will I do.” Isaiah 46:9-11

More Than We Can Imagine

“Mooooooommmmmyyyyyy!  Sit with me?” Sketch says as the sits down at the white board, purple crayon in hand.

“Oh no… He has plans for me, he’s going to make me do it again!” I think to myself, with detailed methods of escape forming in my  mind.

“Zero? Put it here?”  He points to the upper left hand corner of the board and quickly adds, “MOOOMMMY’s turn!”

All I see is all that empty white board space that I KNOW he is going to make me fill in with numbers from zero to as far as it fits…usually 120 or so, and I am filled with dread… How many times a day do I have to do this?

Boy, he is cute though, I gotta say.  Especially with his striped knit hat pulled down over his top eye lids so he has to look up at me from under the hat to see if I am doing what he says.

“Mommy’s turn!  Sit with me?”  He persists.

How could I say no to that adorable little guy…the things we do for our children!

While Sketch’s plans for me may be self-serving, and while they are at times dreaded by me, we have a promise from our Father:  Jeremiah 29:11 -14

11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. 14 I will be found by you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back from captivity.”

It is a comfort to know that Gods plans for us are good:  to free us, for us to find Him, to give us hope & a future, and to prosper us. That is all good stuff, and in hard times, it is a promise to cling to and quite therapeutic to try and imagine what God may be bringing into our life through it.

But, check out this verse:  1 Cor 2:9

“9 However, as it is written:
“What no eye has seen,
what no ear has heard,
and what no human mind has conceived”—
the things God has prepared for those who love him—”

I always thought this verse was talking about heaven.  Only recently did I realize that it is also talking about the here and now…while we are in the midst of living life!

That hope & a future that Jeremiah talks about, those plans that He has for us, are so good that we can’t even imagine what He has in store for us.  Whatever we do imagine, His plan is bigger and better.  This is fuels the hope, and sparks the fire for the future!

So the next time the future seems bleak, or we are in a tough time, not knowing the direction we should go in, instead of giving way to fear, let’s remember that God is good, and he his plans are far beyond our wildest dreams.

Ephesians 3:20-21 20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

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