Mothers Day in a Spectrummy Kinda Way

What a day!  I was just starting to wake this morning, with the gentle breeze blowing the sheers in the window along with the yellow rays of sunlight, when my dear Princess Buttercup enters the room.  Perfect timing.  She carried a silver tray with a heirloom coffee pot full of that wonderful, favorite dark roast blend, full-caffiene coffee that I love, mixed with perfect dashes of cream and sugar.

On the tray was also a wonderful breakfast with freshly baked muffin, freshly picked berries from the garden, a beautifully folded veggie omlet and home-made hashbrowns.  She’d been up for a while, it seems!  She balanced all of this on her 8 year old hand, and carried it up the stairs to me, dressed in fine lenin,  wild flowers tucked into her french braids and corsage on her wrist!  When did she learn to french braid her own hair?

Next comes Dash, the Princess’ twin brother.  He is wearing a 3 piece suit with boutonnière.  Perfectly groomed, he comes bearing gifts of various sizes.  And behind him comes the youngest little cherub, Sketch (6), also dressed formally with boutonniere.  Sketch has drawn beautiful pictures, fit for an art gallery, of sunshine and roses dancing around his family.  What a portrait!

Mr. Incredible had already fed the 3 little ones, and made sure they were all ready for church this morning.

We walk into the building beaming with the wonders of Mothers Day… the children calm and beautiful.

Lunch afterward was even better.

We went to a very expensive, fancy restaurant… Mr. Incredible had made reservations so there was no waiting.  The children sat in their chairs at the table, engaging in polite conversation as we enjoyed our meals.  A piano was being played in the background… more wonderful coffee…the atmosphere just perfect.

Once home, Mr. Incredible and I snuck in an afternoon nap as the children cleaned the house.  We woke up to sparkling floors and lemon-scent bathrooms. No dust in sight!

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Ok, what really happened was more like this:

We wake up to Dash (for those who don’t know, he has autism & a heavy dose of adhd) yelling in his room because he’s frustrated with his k’nex.  He decides he’s hungry so he finds his most irritatingly fussy voice, pushes our door open and with it demands, “I’m hungry. I want some food to eat!”  Correct pronouns…but really???

This does not wake us into a good mood at all…so we tell him to go this his room and be quiet!  Waiting for a more inviting moment to get up, we listen to him continue to complain and fuss.  Giving up on that idea, I sneak downstairs to take my shower so we will have enough time for church.

Mr. Incredible makes sure to give Dash his medication for adhd so he will be easier to live with calm down and be more likely to get ready for church.

After my shower, I entertain the kids while Mr. Incredible gets cleaned up and ready for church.  This means, I sit next to Sketch (also with autism & adhd) and draw copies of DVD covers, perfectly according to his specifications, and including all the fine print, just like the past 100 times he had me do this!!!  But Sketch is happy…

Princess Buttercup is dressed in jeans and her butterfly shirt she’s worn the last few days, hair un-brushed.  Dash clothed himself in a red t-shirt and baggy jeans…hair mixed with breakfast crumbs!  At this point, Sketch is still dressed in his routine outfit of unraveling blue knit hat, and undies.

Mr. Incredible made an adorable Mothers Day video for me, with the kids all saying, “Happy Mothers Day! I love you, Mommy!”  It was very cute.   Then came some Mothers Day presents and cards.  I do have a very nice cup of coffee (k-cup style, dripped directly into a stained & cracked mug) this morning!

Finishing getting ready for church went fairly smoothly, with only one or two meltdowns.  This morning it is because Dash’s worst fear confronted him as a wasp flew into the kitchen.  Full-blown panick-stricken child of 8 tears through the house to his bedroom where he is “safe”.  We don’t see him again until it is time to load up the car…and of course, there is a bumblebee in the greenhouse right next to the car!

On the way to church, Dash concludes that he will play outside again in the winter, when it is safe because there are no bees.

Church went wonderfully.  The kids stayed in their sunday school class and no one had meltdown, and no one was kicking other children… That was sooo nice.

On the way out of church though, was another story.  Dash’s phobia of bees is worse this year. He screamed the entire way to the car because the sun was out and there may be a bee…ugh!

Besides that screaming fit,  they behaved very well at Sunday School, and we told Sketch if he was good we could go through the drive through at McDonalds (cheers from all the kids, and Sketch was truly beaming in excitement!).

Now, he (Sketch) doesn’t eat ANYTHING there, nor can he (except for a pre-packaged juice box, but he won’t drink that because it isn’t White-Grape juice, and it has to be in his Nalgene sippy cup) because of food allergies. He was incredibly excited though, because he got to listen to the drive-thru attendant talk through the speaker, and watch the entire transaction. HEAVEN!

We didn’t get lunch there, we just got some Vitamin Water… never underestimate the power of a Vitamin Water bribe!

At home I cook lunch.  Dash throws a major fit because Sketch came in the house and left the door open for a few seconds (bees could come in, you know!) so he ends up in his room to calm down.

I had bought some toaster waffles (so I didn’t have to cook) and microwave organic sausages, and pears.  Just heat & serve on Solo paper plates!  The afternoon continued as any Sunday afternoon would… a couple meltdowns, a couple defiant I-don’t-want-to screams, watching Veggie Tales, trying to sneak in a nap, cooking & dishes.

Dinner plans you ask??  Well of course!  Frozen Pizza!  Newmans Own.  Just heat & serve!

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This was a typical Mothers Day for us.  Knowing we wouldn’t go out to eat today, I made things the kids would love  & enjoy (and eat without complaining) with minimal “work”.  They loved it and were very happy to have it, which makes me very happy too.  Meals can be big stressors around here, so by eliminating that for the day is very much a break for us all!  Incorporating things like drive-thru’s to make a child beam in delight is another easy thing to make the day go more smoothly and joyfully.  If I could have contained all the bees in the area today, I would have done that too!  It is because of my kids that I am given the title of Mom.  Giving them a less-stress day is just as meaningful to me as if I were relaxing on Mothers Day.

Typical days are full of stress in a house with kids on the spectrum.  Stress often leads to short tempers, and harsher-than-intended words (like this morning with Dash).

Today at church we sang a wonderful song called More Than Amazing.  In the chorus, it says, “Forgetting all my sins, You remember all your promises”.  What a wonderful thing to be reminded of:  That our God does not make his promises to us (to help, protect, love, provide, etc.) contingent on our “good behavior”.  He remembers all his promises and applies them to our lives even when we are messing up over & over again.  And you can bet your bottom dollar that enjoys giving rest to his children too!

Psalm 127:2
It is useless for you to work so hard from early morning until late at night, anxiously working for food to eat; for God gives rest to his loved ones.

Isaiah 40: 29-31

29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

Happy Mothers Day everyone!

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6 Comments

  1. betsy said,

    May 8, 2011 at 8:45 PM

    smiled through the whole thing since I can relate to SO much of it! 🙂

    happy mother’s day to you!

    • Merri Lewis said,

      May 9, 2011 at 3:38 PM

      I’m glad I made you smile 🙂 I laughed while I wrote the first part…so “not us” it was really funny to me. I hope you had a great Mothers Day too 🙂 You’re an amazing mom!

  2. Alienhippy said,

    May 9, 2011 at 3:06 PM

    Helllo my friend,
    OMGoodness….I cracked up at the wasp. My *CAL goes full meltdown at even a buzzy noise. She too has decided to stay in till winter. She is an absolute nightmare with anything flying Merri, I open the windows to air the house and she goes round closing them. Not great in a 1930’s brick built home in our climate.
    Your life is SO like mine Merri….thank goodness we have Jesus who understands and gives us the strength and example of how to get through it all.
    You know what though…I prefer your real life to the one you imagined, why would we call out to God and accept His unconditional love if we had perfect lives.
    I loved your line…
    “That our God does not make his promises to us (to help, protect, love, provide, etc.) contingent on our “good behaviour”
    It’s a good job really isn’t it! 😉 xx
    Love you loads.
    Lisa. xxx 🙂

    • Merri Lewis said,

      May 9, 2011 at 3:42 PM

      Lisa, Dash does that too–flies drive him nuts, anything that flies in the air makes him cover his ears and run for shelter. I am going to try to help him think ahead about coming across bees and see if he has a plan about what to do when he comes across a bee (etc.) if he’ll be able to stay a bit calmer… Have you found any thing that helps CAL? Dash shuts our windows too!!! Except, that is, when he is about to jump out of it LOL (kinda). Our house gets so hot, too… I can sympathize!!!

      My pretend life was funny to me b/c it’s so not real 🙂 So the opposite of what life is like. It would be nice every once in a blue moon, but not for day-to-day!!! There’d be no fun…all worries about getting clothes dirty 🙂

      It is an awesome job–best one I’ve ever had!

      • Alienhippy said,

        May 9, 2011 at 4:07 PM

        Hi Merri,
        I haven’t found anything yet to help *CAL with this, but I do remember being like this with wasps myself after my brother trod on one that flew in his sandal. Someone told me when I was a child that if I saw a wasp all I needed to do was bite my tongue and keep still. They told me it would send out electric waves that confuse wasps and make me invisible. Well OF COURSE I totally believed this and thought I was invincible as well as invisible to wasps. It did actually work for me, but I can’t lie so I can’t try this with *CAL. I guess it is mind over matter, perhaps we should pray about it. If God gives you any answers let me know, I’ll pass anything on that He drops into my head too.
        What are your kids like with vacuum cleaners, *CAL still runs out of the room holding her ears with my cylinder, she’s sort of ok with the upright…but my upright Hoover has just blown up. Story of my life really. Just as I get enough money to do something special an electrical appliance blows up.
        Love you Loads.
        Lisa. xxx 🙂

  3. Merri Lewis said,

    May 9, 2011 at 6:16 PM

    That is too funny!!! I’m glad it worked for you and you didn’t get stung–if you had, how traumatic would that be?!!! I just emailed you an article by a dad who has a son with bee phobia and it had great suggestions in it.

    Dash used to be very upset by the vaccuum, but now is ok. He does leave the room, or go get headphones. He has even vaccuumed himself (with headphones) which I think helped him cope with it a bit. Sketch couldn’t hear so well when he was really little, so it didn’t bother him as much. Now he’s bothered, but not so much he cant handle it.


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